UK Cafe Guide

The surly waitress/waiter can be a real turn-on. Some cafe spend years trying to soften the grumpy staff at their favourite café to the point where they end up going home with them and learning about how making salads and soups and all manner of light refreshments can drive you insane with frustration at not having done something more meaningful with your life. For those who aspire to explore the psyche of the moody waiter, this is the place. Oh, and by the way, the food is top notch! Don’t tell a soul.

An all rounder with most café tools in its armoury. Paninis, sarnies, bagels, cakes and a good quality coffee machine to make sure your caffeine boost reaches its peak in perfect time, this place is to be commended too on its friendly staff, tasteful décor and convenient location just off the Suffolk Queensway facing the BBC (Titchmarsh territory). Fans of fruit smoothies and milkshakes should also be reassured to know that the pureed banana has found an ideal home here in B1.

One of the best restaurants in Birmingham. This place is cheap, cheerful and serves great quality food in a modern and clean restaurant. Situated in the heart of Birmingham City Centre (behind the Rag Market), this unassuming cafe serves incredibly good food at reasonable prices. The waiting staff are all very friendly and more than willing to help you choose something if you are stuck- the menu is pretty extensive, but all meals (including incredibly filling broths) are under £8 or so.

Does what it says on the tin. Of Walmart baked beans. Brighton, hedonist-central on the South coast an hour out of London,  is crammed with the weird and wonderful, and this is where you’ll see them at their dogged, up all-night-raving, scraping the drug and booze haze out of their ears via a lard-based intravenous injection of heartstopping proportions worst. The coffee here is not exactly legendary, but the point is to know what a good old fashioned English Café is all about – i.e. more than just following the snootier Brighton Café Reviews. Get all the best greasy breakfast fry-up ingredients, pile them on a single plate till they’re dripping onto the formica tabletop à la Michael Phelps, and know that you’ll soon be in bed, sleeping off the fattest head of your life.

This is the kind of place you want to hole up for a few days and write your novel. Manchester is the heart of the old Industrial north, familiar with Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (creator of Sherlock Holmes) among others. So if your novel has been taking a while to come out, don’t worry, you’ll have just as fruitful a time watching Mancunians go by and admiring the stolid red brick buildings amid the bustle of a metropolitan city. And luckily, the caffeine produce on offer is conducive to thought. Chain cafés like Starbucks and co. may know how to make easy reliable coffee for people who have left their imagination at home, but when you visit the Art of Tea, you’ll remember what a true cappucino is all about. Nice drink, friendly people, and a seat you’ll want to make your own.